Burnout Resources

Last week, I talked about how my burnout happened and how, finally, relaxing into relaxing about writing helped me. But there were lots of resources I leaned into during that process to understand what was happening, how I tick, and prioritize what I wanted going forward. Getting your spark back isn’t easy, but it is doable.

Get a Coach

Before I even admitted I was burned out, I signed up for a class with Becca Syme of Better Faster Academy called “Write Better, Faster.” The name of the course sounds like it focuses too much on production, but that’s not what it does. Syme is a writing coach and a certified CliftonStrengths coach. She gives a battery of personality tests (Meyers Briggs, DISC, Strengths) and then helps you identify what about your writing processes isn’t working in concert with your natural strengths. These results also help figure out things like: Is Indie, Traditional or Hybrid Publishing a better fit for your personality? How do your personality traits influence the parts of writing craft you’re naturally good at/weak at?

It’s good stuff.

It was during a one-on-one with her during this class that she gave me permission to stop writing for a while. I’d been spinning my wheels for a while and it was such a relieve to hear that it was okay to just stop.

I also took Becca’s Strengths for Writers Advanced class. This is a deep dive into your top strengths and how to develop those and work around the things you’re not as strong at. Understanding what I’m really good at and how to develop those was really enlightening. P.S. I also had my husband do the test, and seeing how our strengths complement each other was really interesting.

Becca also has a series of books that talk about Questioning the Premise of a lot of publishing advice, how to deal with burnout, etc.

As you can tell, I leaned heavily on Becca for help during this recovery, and I’ll continue to sing her praises. She has new classes coming up soon and her books can all be found at her site.

I also had a session with Christine Hennebury, who is a very warm and encouraging writing coach. She was great at reminding me to be nicer to myself and she encouraged me to focus more on playing. Check her out.

Get a Hobby

The problem with having your hobby turn into your career is that it fundamentally changes your relationship to the activity. So when I became a full-time writer, writing stopped being my escape and started being my responsibility. Not only was my ego tied into it but so was my family’s income. After a few years, I realized I’d become a workaholic. All of my friends were writers, I went to conventions as my vacation, and if I wasn’t writing I was talking about it.

During my burnout, one of the first things I did was sign up for a painting class at the local community center. I love art and have enjoyed art classes in the past. However, I know I am not an artist. I’ve gotten better, but I don’t have ambition to make money off of it—that’s key, friends. It’s just fun to slap paint on a canvas for a couple of hours and have a complete picture of an apple or a rooster. Here’s why it was the perfect hobby during my burnout:

1. It got me out of my head. I didn’t have to think my way through the project. I just played with putting color on the canvas.

2. I could complete a creative project in one sitting. A huge contrast to spending months/years on a novel.

3. I could remember what it was like to just lose myself in the zone. It got to the point where every time I sat down I had the voices of my editor, my agent, my fans, my colleagues talking at me as I wrote. I could still get in the zone, but it was harder and harder to get there. But with painting, I could just lose track of time and look up two hours later with a wonky owl looking back at me from the canvas. It’s important to remember what it feels like to have total focus on creation. To remember how good that feels, and how that feeling was one of the reasons I wanted to be a writer in the first place.

So find a thing that’s like that for you. It could be cooking, subversive cross-stitch, taking a sword class, take up yoga, make airplane models, etc. Turn off the TV, log of social media, and focus on doing that thing. Have some fun. You deserve it.

Get Perspective

Sometimes the reasons we begin writing don’t inspire us anymore. When I started out, I wanted to prove myself so much. Could I get a contract? Could I write a series? Could I hit a bestseller list? Once I’d done all of those things, it got harder to find new things to chase. It was around then that I went back to school to get my MFA. The new goal wasn’t proving myself but deepening my craft. I also wanted to teach.

Once I started teaching, I found I didn’t know what I wanted from my writing anymore. I think this is why I needed to take a break. I had to reprioritize. I’m not the same write in my 40s that I was in my 30s. Now I’m more interested in mentoring and pushing envelopes and going deeper to write stories that are more vulnerable.

I also suddenly had a teenager in high school. He’s my only kid. That meant that A. we only have a few years left before he goes out on his own and B. he needed us to be there for him in a different way than he needed in the past. High school has not been easy on any of us. Last fall, we had an issue that required us to pull him out of school and teach him at home. It’s been so good for him, but it required a big reprioritization. Having a happy kid is more important to me than books on the shelf in B&N. And wouldn’t you know it? Once I shifted my focus onto the things that really mattered to me, a door opened. Without all the pressure on writing to bolster my identity, I could more easily make time for writing because it was, once again, something I could do as an escape from all the teaching I was doing.

Oh, how the wheel turns, my friends.

So if you came to me and said you couldn’t write anymore, I’d tell you to get real about what sort of pressure you put on writing to do things writing can’t actually do. It can’t make you feel loved, not really. It can’t give you financial security. It can’t solve your daddy or your mommy issues.

What writing can do is help you figure some things out. It can provide an escape from the pressures of your life. It can help you feel proud of finishing stories. It can be a meditative practice. It can help you meet new people. It can deepen your empathy. It can help you give a voice to your heart.

So get real. Get some therapy, if you can. Figure out what you’re trying to prove and get real about whether writing can get you what you crave. If it can’t, then work on that shit so you can have some fun playing with you imaginary friends again.

By the way, I finished a short story yesterday. It’s the first fiction I’ve completed in two years. It’s rough. That’s okay. I’ll work on it until it’s better. I have no idea if I’ll ever sell it, but that doesn’t matter because I had fun writing it. Finally, again.

Happy writing, friends.

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